The last few months have been one of the most challenging, but most incredible I’ve ever lived. I’ve been devoting every moment possible to finishing a book of comfort for those who have lost a loved to one to suicide. I’ve decided to call it After My Son’s Suicide: An LDS Mother Finds Comfort in Christ and Strength to Go on.
Looking back over the past six years has been an exercise of remembering the Lord’s tender mercies and kind tutoring. The thing that has impressed me the most is how much I’d forgotten until I went back and read entries in my journal and other things I’d written over that period of time. Even startling, important things I had forgotten! Like the day I wrote the following entry about my son in the Spirit World, who I had wept and prayed for since his suicide:
June 5, 2005: “Had a special study time with conference talks and scriptures in the morning and was left with a burning desire to know if Brian is accepting the gospel and feeling what I am feeling, is knowing the truth of God and Christ and the Atonement and the Restoration. Went into the kitchen to get a drink of water and the Spirit washed over me and I KNEW, I KNEW Brian has chosen Christ, is repenting and making great progress. I can’t begin to express the joy this brings me. There is absolutely nothing I have desired more than to know that.” Continue reading